The Journal of Madie Beartri

Journal 86

Yates kept his word. My time at Fort Shasta is ending. Tomorrow, we go home to Bear Country.  I miss my home and my friends. I miss my room in the admin hallway. I miss my life as gang leader. I thought I needed a break from being gang leader, from the responsibility. I went on a little vacation with some of my closest friends. The vacation didn’t turn out the way I thought it would. I was expecting two weeks of relaxation and a little time to be myself with no responsibilities, no worries, except for my responsibility to Aleece. Sometimes life gives you a little lesson. I have learned a great deal from this experience. I learned that I am stronger than I realized. I will no longer take my life for granted.

This morning at the parade grounds a ceremony was held formally making Yates the new General and leader of Fort Shasta. I think he will make a good leader even if he did read my journal without asking.  I think that reading my story gave Yates a deep appreciation for me. It’s funny but I usually keep my journal close to me. I don’t know why I left it on the table.

General Yates and his officers are going to discuss making Fort Shasta open to the public. This will help decrease the shortage of women. He is making purchasing wives from the slave traders illegal. I think this is a wise decision.

Hemy is out of jail and can’t wait to get back home to Matt.  She didn’t have much of a honeymoon. This could explain her crankiness and irritability. Please note that she is the only one of us that ended up in jail.

Journal 85

Yates spent most of last evening at the jail discussing the trial with his sister. He left early this morning before I had the chance to talk to him. He left me a note with instructions to meet him at the trial building. I dropped David and Aleece off at the preschool and then walked over to the trial building. Yates met me at the door. He looked worried and a bit frustrated. The first thing he said was that he was sorry. Playing dumb, I said “About what?” He surprised me by saying “for bringing you here.”  I thought he was going to mention my journal. “Does this mean I can go back home to Bear Country?” I was only kidding because I truly was expecting his answer to be NO. He surprised me again by saying that if I helped his sister get a fair trial he would let me and my friends go home, including Hemy.  No pressure!

A few hours later, Yates and I with several of the top officers from Fort Shasta entered the courtroom. General Scott began the trial by saying that a trial wasn’t necessary. His wife was obviously guilty and he was prepared to pass sentence.  The crowd in the room suddenly got very noisy. Yates stood up and objected. He asked General Scott to step down from the bench. General Scott refused. The other officers stood up and one at a time asked for General Scott to step down. The General said there wasn’t anyone else in the room qualified to be the judge.  Yates said that I was qualified. I was a gang leader and impartial to these hearings. The other officers agreed. General Scott stepped down and I stepped up. Ten officers took their places on the jury.

The trial only lasted a few hours. Witnesses from both sides had a chance to speak their minds, including the General. Yates’s sister never denied her guilt. The jurors left the room and came back within thirty minutes time with a verdict of guilty and a plan for restitution. The officers on the jury considered the crime of adultery a serious matter. They suggested that Yates’ sister spend the next year performing the dirty jobs that no one else wanted to do around Fort Shasta. The officers also dissolved her marriage to General Scott. She will give a public apology. I agreed with the verdict and the suggested restitution.

General Scott disagreed with the outcome of the trial. He went ballistic and started ranting and raving about the scum of society. He said she was getting off easy. He wanted his wife dead. He said he didn’t want her hanging around undermining his authority.  Yates asked General Scott to be quiet. He was making himself look bad. The General continued yelling, then dove at his wife, and tried to strangle her.

General Scott was relieved of his duties as leader of Fort Shasta by the other officers.

Journal 84

Yates took me to the jail to see Hemy. She was sitting on a bench, in a jail cell, dressed in a gray jumpsuit. I must have been an unexpected visitor because the moment I said “HI,” she jumped up off the bench. I apologized for getting her in this mess. If I hadn’t invited her and Matt along on my getaway to the lodge she would still be safe at Central.  Hemy said it wasn’t my fault. It was the creep of a new husbands fault. He should have taken her “No” seriously. We talked for a long time. I promised to help her get out of jail. I passed on the information that Yates gave me. He said that there would be a trial and that I could testify on her behalf. Hemy didn’t seem to be thrilled about going to trial. I tried to calm her nerves by telling her not to worry. I wish I wasn’t worried.

Other news, Yates sister is in the cell next to Hemy. She is in jail because she was caught having an affair with a soldier. Her husband is General Scott, the leader of Fort Shasta and the best friend of Yates. Yates and General Scott have been friends since they were both in diapers. Yates said that the affair his sister had with the other soldier has hurt his friendship with General Scott. The two men are barely speaking to each other. Yates also said that the General is not in his right mind. He had the other soldier killed and would have had his sister killed too if he hadn’t intervened.  The General scheduled the trial for tomorrow. The General plans to play judge. I don’t see how a fare trial could come from this.

I write a great deal of my life in my journals. I suppose if you wanted to know what kind of person I was, you would or could read my journal entries. I have never hidden my journal or locked it away from the eyes of others. It never occurred to me to do that. I was a little surprised when I woke up this morning to fine Yates reading the entries. I don’t think he knew I was standing there. I almost jumped out and scared him but decided not to. I quietly went back to bed so that he could finish reading my story. He knows a lot more about me now. I’m thinking this is probably a good thing.  Yates, I hope you enjoyed my story. I am open for questions.

Journal 83

I should be thankful that I am in a pleasant situation. Mathias could have sold me to the scum of the earth. Yates has been a gentleman. He is a good father. He is second in command on this base, and he looks good in a uniform. So far, the only thing I can hold against him is that he bought me from a slave trader.

One of my friends has not been so lucky. Guards are holding Hemy in custody for beating up her new husband. I guess he wasn’t a gentleman. Yates said she beat him up pretty badly. I’m not surprised. I asked if I could go and visit her. Yates said he would try to arrange for that to happen later today.

I met Lisa, Emily, and Kate at the preschool. It was good to see them. They are doing fine considering their circumstances. Lisa and Kate look a little depressed, but Emily seems happy. I think she likes her new husband.  I passed on the information about Hemy. We all had a good laugh and then the conversation turned serious. The topic of our conversation was mainly about Bear Country and getting home.

Bear Country does not compare to this base. They have things here that we could only dream about. If I wasn’t homesick and if I didn’t have responsibilities to Bear Country, I could almost call this place home. I am making the best of my current situation, but I need to go home. I want to go back to the life I was living. I want to see my friends, all of my friends. I continue to hope that Matt, Jonas, Pete, Joshua, Tony, and Runt are all alive and well.

I am patiently waiting for Yates to return from his meeting with the Base Commander. He went there to discuss some issues about his sister. I am curious. What issue?

Journal 82

Yates gave Aleece and me a tour of Fort Shasta. Fort Shasta was a secret military base back before the virus. Yates and several of the people that live on this base are the children of former soldiers that worked here. Yates’ father was a Colonel and a communications officer. This is a very clean, very well-maintained base.  The population is bigger than I imagined, and it is true that there aren’t many women around. Yates said everyone here was expected to work. He said it would be a couple of days before he could find me a suitable occupation.

I will have more freedom than I expected. Yates said I can go anywhere I liked on the base, but I would have to stay away from the areas that are marked for soldiers only. Unless of course I decided to enlist in the army then I would have access to some of the other places. Curiosity was killing me, with the freedom given what was keeping me here. I wasn’t surprised by the answer Yates gave me. He said there wasn’t anywhere to go. This is a secret military base. There is only one way in and one way out. Armed soldiers guard the entrance. He said I could try to go over the mountains, but he wouldn’t recommend it. The mountains are extremely steep and there is an electric fence around the entire perimeter. He said if I managed to make it up the mountain and over the fence, I would have to worry about wild animals. This area has mountain lions, bears and other wild critters that would love to make a meal of me. I don’t even know which direction would lead me home to Bear Country.

The end of our tour ended at a very colorful building with ducks and rabbits and other cartoon characters painted on the sides. Before we walked inside Yates said he didn’t bring me here to Fort Shasta to be his sex slave. I breathed a sigh of relief. I spent all night thinking of excuses I could use to avoid sex. He said he brought me here to be a mom to his two-year-old son. His wife died last year from pneumonia. He said he loved his wife and didn’t expect me to fill her shoes. Yates’ sister was taking care of the boy but she is now unavailable.  I was going to ask why she is unavailable but decided against it. Sometimes I think there is a higher power out there laughing at me trying to see how complicated he can make my life.  I now have the responsibility of caring for two children that aren’t my own. Yates’ son David is adorable, and he was so glad to see his Dad when we walked into the building. The four of us walked back home.

I have not seen the other girls since my arrival. I am hoping their stay at Fort Shasta has been as pleasant. Yates said he would locate their quarters for me so that I could visit my friends, but he cautioned about breaking any rules or trying to escape.

Journal 81

It has been a long and interesting day. It was midday before our buyers appeared. I felt like a dog in the pound. Luckily, the buyers found all of us acceptable. I only say the word “luckily” because if the boys are alive and if they are making plans to rescue us it would be better if we were all together in the same place.

We are all decent looking women, and I have to admit that Lisa is cute. Two of the men that arrived to retrieve us wanted to take Lisa as their wife. There were a couple of minutes of “I saw her first” and “why do you get first choice” but our buyers solved the problem with a round of rock, paper, and scissors. I hate that game. If I had been Lisa, I would have been very offended that the two men fighting over me didn’t participate in an actual dual to the death. I didn’t get that kind of drama. I got “I’ll take that one over there.”  There is something insulting about being chosen last even in a situation like this. If Yates had known I was about to cost him more than he had bargained for he would have chosen one of the other wives. My new husband didn’t seem as excited about this whole “I’m getting a new wife thing” as the other men. My first thought was “great, I get the moody, cranky one.”

I pleaded and begged Yates to pay for Aleece. There was a brief moment when I thought I might not get her back. Mathias said he had already promised the Shakers that they could have Aleece, but I think he was just trying to get Yates to pay more for her.  A couple of tears and a please and Aleece was mine again. I cried more the moment that she was in my arms.

The trip to our new home lasted a couple of hours. I think we headed west but I’m not sure.  We spent the entire time in the back of a truck with no windows. Our new home looks like a military installation surrounded by mountains on all sides. I’m thinking that there is only one way in and one way out. We must have passed through a tunnel toward the end of our journey because there were several minutes of darkness and then it got light again.  I want to go home but it looks like escaping from here is going to be a difficult challenge.

Yates has actually been very kind. Our new home is small but comfortable.

Journal 80

It felt like we had been in this cell for days even though it had been only a few hours. We were all stressed, angry, and tearful at times. We kept trying to reassure each other that our loved ones and friends weren’t dead.  My head ran through possible scenarios for our capture. I kept trying to think positive thoughts, but my mind kept wandering back to the awful possibility that our friends weren’t as lucky as we were.  I was afraid that they were dead back at the campsite. Then, suddenly I pictured Aleece in that cabin all alone with no one there to help her. I sat down and cried.

He wasn’t at all what I thought our captor would look like. I was expecting someone big and ugly, with a nasty black smile. He wasn’t like that at all. He walked into the room nicely dressed, confident and handsome. He was holding a tray of food. The first thing he said was “Good morning, ladies. My name is Mathias. Welcome to Alexandria City and sorry about the accommodation.”

We started yelling at him all at once. Why are we here? Where are our friends? He told us to relax, he could only answer us one at a time. He pointed to me, so I asked my question. Where is Aleece? He looked a little confused. She’s a baby, blond hair, wearing a pink dress.

Mathias looked at me with those big brown eyes and that shiny white smile. “Oh right …I’m selling her to the Shakers. Don’t worry, she is going to a wonderful gang. They don’t believe in sex, and they can’t have children of their own. So, they buy orphans.”

I tried to reach through the bars to ring his neck, but my arms were too short. “She is not an orphan. She belongs to me.”

“Not anymore. I’m getting a good price for her.” He assured me that Aleece would lead a wonderful life, have plenty of food, schooling, and an excellent religious upbringing.

Then (and he said this with a smile) that we were being sold to a gang that needed women. He said I would have plenty of opportunity to have more children.

Hemy went ballistic then. She said it was illegal to buy and sell people and she said she already had a husband. Mathias played dumb. He said he didn’t know anything about Matt, Jonas, Tony, Sheriff Pete, Joshua or Runt.  He said he had advertised for women. Little Aleece was a bonus. Oh, and he said that it wasn’t illegal to buy and sell people in Alexandria City.  Apparently, the slave trade is alive and well in this part of the country.

I begged to see Aleece. I promised Mathias that I would do anything, he asked if I could just see her for a moment. He smiled that smile and said “NO,” but he did say that if I could get my buyer to pay for Aleece I could have her back.

 

 

Journal 79

The unexpected sometimes happens. I woke up with a tremendous headache. I hurt so bad that sitting up was a challenge. Lisa, Hemy, Kate and Emily were lying in various positions on the cell floor. There was a window in our cell. I couldn’t tell what time it was but the sun was just barely starting to rise. I crawled over to the girls and tried to get them to wake up. They responded in various ways. Emily must have been feeling as bad as I was because she puked all over the floor the moment she sat up. It was all I could do not to follow suit. My first verbal thought was “What the hell happened?” Then there was a sudden panic when I realized that the boys and Aleece weren’t with us.  I started yelling for anyone that was on the other side of the bars, but no one came. I tried shaking the bars, and kicking the bars to get someone’s attention but the activity made my head hurt worse. I fell back down onto the floor. For a moment, I even considered that this whole thing was some awful nightmare brought on by bad fish eaten after the wedding ceremony. I knew I wasn’t dreaming when Lisa asked if she was.

The girls and I tried to piece together what happened. I vaguely remember being jolted awake by hands on my face. It was the same for Kate and Emily. Hemy said she and Matt were sleeping when several dark figures entered their room. She said she didn’t get a good look at anyone because before she could react someone was placing a rag on her mouth and nose.

We are stuck in this cell. I am hoping not for long. With any luck, the boys will have been able to escape our attackers, and they are at this moment planning our rescue.

Journal 78

I think the fresh air does something to people’s minds. Matt and Hemy have decided to marry. I am not surprised because they are always together, and they spend every waking hour in each other’s arms. It must be an amazing feeling to be in love. We don’t live under the same rules and restrictions that our parents lived under. A marriage certificate was required back then. A legal document signed. Today you can just make a verbal commitment to each other and continue with life. There is something special about saying to someone “Will you spend the rest of your life with me?” We still hold ceremonies. Sometimes they are elaborate and sometimes they are simple.

We spent the day gathering flowers and decorating the campsite. A nice meal has been prepared. Hemy is pacing in the next room, rehearsing what she is going to say to Matt in her promise and Matt is next door probably doing the exact same thing. Keeping those two apart for a few hours was a challenge but we did it. I have written a wedding speech to the both of them. It’s somewhat ironic because I have never been in love. (I think I know what love is). Shortly, the ceremony will start and Matt and Hemy will promise to love each other forever.

When Matt and Hemy asked me to write this speech, my first response was to say “No”. Get someone else to write it. I am not qualified. I did a little soul searching and I have experienced love and commitment. I think we all have. I loved my parents and to some degree, I love all of my friends. Little Aleece shows me love every time she blows one of those bubble raspberries. (It’s cute you should really see it.).

We all have commitment to something. As the leader of Bear Country, I have been charged with making sure that our gang remains a viable and productive part of society. I have never experienced true romantic love or known the unspoken commitment that love of that magnitude brings. I was going to try to define love for everyone here today, but “Love” is a personal thing between two people. Only Matt and Hemy can define their Love. I hope that the love that the two of you share lasts forever. Let this day, this ceremony, be a reminder of your commitment to love each other in good times and in bad. Matt and Hemy have written their own vows to each other and have asked us here today to witness this joyous occasion. (Insert their vows here.)

I have written and rewritten. It’s not a long speech but I think it will be satisfactory.

Journal 77

When I was small, my dad introduced me to the pinecone people and their little villages. I think it was his way of keeping me occupied when he and my mom were trying to recuperate from the day’s activities. It worked because I was busy. You can do a great deal with pinecones. They come in a variety of shapes and sizes. I made people and I built cities.

This morning after breakfast, I was showing Runt and Aleece the Pine Cone people. Tony walks up behind me and kisses me on the cheek. I didn’t object to the kiss. It was just a little unexpected. I said, “Good morning.” and then Tony said “Good morning.”  I asked Tony if he had plans for the day. He said he was going to go exploring with Runt and asked me if I wanted to go along. I declined because the girls and I already made plans. That kiss on the cheek has been on my mind all day. It was probably one of those, life is good, I am having a good day kiss. One of those moments when you are just glad to be alive and you need to show it by kissing someone on the cheek. Anyone in the vicinity and I was that person. He probably would have kissed Lisa, Emily, or Kate if they were sitting there.

The girls and I discussed kissing today. We discussed the different types of kisses and their meanings. Apparently, you shouldn’t get excited about a kiss on the cheek.  If it’s nothing to get excited about then why is it still on my mind?