The Journal of Madie Beartri

Journal 72

It took us a little longer to get started on our little journey than we expected. The wait for the truck took forever. When the truck arrived, it was huge. I was expecting a normal pickup truck. The truck Tony, Pete and Jonas brought back to Bear Country was military issue. I didn’t even know there was a truck like that in Bear Country.

We loaded up our gear and supplies. It amazes me what people think they need to bring on a vacation. The journey wasn’t too bad once we actually got started. We played a few hands of rock, paper, and scissors to choose the driver. There was no traffic, which isn’t surprising because most kids don’t drive. There were a few people walking along the way, a cow in the road, and several stray dogs. Tony hit a big pothole in the road and those of us in the back went flying. He said he didn’t see the hole until it was too late. Jonas took over driving after that.

We arrived at the lodge just as it was starting to get dark. We all decided that it would probably be a good idea if we all stayed in the big house until the morning. Tomorrow we will check out the cabins near the lake. Everyone started to unload the truck. Emily took Aleece and Runt into the lodge to scope out the rooms. We were expecting the inside to be a mess. Some of the windows were broken out and the front door was off its hinges. The lodge was probably home to an assortment of animals and little critters. We heard Emily scream. We dropped everything and went to help expecting to find an angry raccoon, a snake, or a large angry spider.

The past came rushing back as soon as we entered the room at the top of the stairs. Emily was standing there frozen, crying.

We don’t know when she died. She probably came here to the lodge to escape the disease. She was lying on the bed and next to the bed was the portable crib. The baby, a little girl, was sitting leaning against the bars. She was wearing My Little Pony pajamas. No one said anything but we all knew because we had seen this sort of thing before that the baby died sometime after her mom. There was no one there to save her. Her last days were misery. You can only imagine how she must have cried for her mom empty bottle in hand. Her mom must have thought they would be safe here, away from people, away from the disease.

It felt as if we stood there forever. I was resisting the urge to cry and then suddenly I needed to know what their names were. I started going through the drawers looking for identification. Tony made me stop. He pushed the others and me out of the room. He closed the door and tied a piece of fabric around the handle. It’s what we used to do to let others know that death was behind a door.  There were so many dead that we couldn’t bury them all. A few of us tried but the task was too big. It was easier to tie a piece of cloth around the door handle.

We all walked back downstairs to the lobby. Our little two-week vacations have started with sadness. We all thought of going home but what would be the point, we can’t change what happened in the past. Jonas was the first person to speak. It was funny in a morbid kind of way. He said, “I guess we won’t be staying in that room tonight.”

Journal 71

Brightens Mountain is east of Bear Country. On that mountain is an old resort my family used to visit when I was a child. It used to be a popular place, especially in the winter when it snowed. I remember having so much fun up there. In the summer, my parents would rent one of the cabins and we would stay for a week and go fishing. My Dad spent his time baiting the hooks and trying to keep me from falling off the edge into the water. I miss those times.

Tony, Sheriff Pete, and Jonas are currently out getting a truck and enough gas to get us there and back. I’m almost finished with my packing. I left a message with a couple of people and on the bulletin board for Casey in case she returns before we get back. Bear Country will be safe.

In a couple of hours, I will leave my worries behind for two weeks. I won’t be alone. The list of people going on this little vacation includes Aleece, Tony, Runt, Pete, Jonas, Lisa, and Matt, Hemy, Joshua, his sister Kate, Emily, and me.

Journal 70

Tony dropped by to see me. He stood in my doorway for a few moments. I was sitting in the rocker playing with Aleece. I was sort of ignoring that he was standing there. I think I was waiting for Tony to say something first. He finally said something like “So how are things going today?” I did the eye roll thing and said “Life is fine.” I don’t think he believed me. I’m not sure I believe in me. I continued to play with Aleece, hoping he would just go away. Tony came all the way in my room. He sat on the couch. I did more rolling of my eyes. “What do you want?” I asked. Tony innocently said he wanted nothing. He just wanted to know if Aleece and I wanted to go to the park for lunch. I calmly said that the park was still too wet from the storm. He had an alternative plan. He invited us to the Arcade. I tried to say no but he insisted. I bundled up Aleece and we went to the Arcade.

The arcade was fun. Hyatt was as polite and nice as he was the last time we stepped into his establishment. I was glad the storm didn’t hurt his business. I spent the next few hours trying to avoid a serious conversation with Tony. I know he wanted to talk to me about recent events. I did everything I could to avoid discussing the issues. Tony finally got tired of chasing me around. He cornered me and dragged me outside to a bench.

The first thing I said was that I didn’t think Casey was coming back. The responsibility was overwhelming me. Tony said it was OK. He’d help. He said Casey would be back. I am not sure if he really believed that or if he was just trying to make me feel better. Our conversation continued about many other things. We even discussed my role as Gang leader. I have been gang leader from the beginning but lately I have wondered if maybe I should step down and let someone else take over.  Tony listened carefully to everything I had to say, and he was very sympathetic. I cried all over his shirt. Only good friends let you do that. Our conversation ended when I heard Aleece crying inside of the Arcade. Hyatt was doing his best to calm her down. She was just hungry.

The walk home was a quiet one, but I felt better. Tony said he would watch over Aleece for the rest of the evening and give her back to me in the morning. I didn’t object.

 

 

Journal 69

I haven’t seen this journal in two days.  The rain stopped and the other gangs went home. The storm caused a lot of damage around Bear Country. The wind blew trees over. Several buildings are missing their roofs. Our school favored very well except for the water that came in through the front doors. Matt and Hemy said their school building also survived the storm with minimal damage. People have gone back to doing whatever it is they normally do.

I had a scare today. I lay down to take a nap while Aleece was napping. When I woke up, she wasn’t in her cradle. It was a little unnerving until I realized that Lisa or Emily probably had her.  I went to get a drink and ran into Lisa. I asked her if she had Aleece. She said no. Ok, Emily probably has her. I looked everywhere for Emily. No one had seen her or Aleece. My heart began to race. They weren’t inside Bear Country. I went to the plaza. Maybe Emily took Aleece on a walk. I couldn’t find her at the plaza, and no one there claimed to have seen her either. I went to the park, no Emily or Aleece.  I ran back to Bear Country. The first person I saw was Pete. I was in a panic. I said that Emily and Aleece are missing. He probably thought I was insane. That’s when Emily walked up behind me with Aleece in her arms.  I lost control and started yelling at her for taking Aleece without my permission. I said many other things I wish I could take back as well. I snatched Aleece back and went to my room. I’ve been here all afternoon.  I hope Casey comes back soon. Motherhood is warping my brain.

Journal 68

The storm continues. Water is seeping in around the doors. There is an ocean outside the front door of Bear Country. If the rain continues for much longer, we are going to have to start moving people up to the second floor of the school. I dread the clean up. The same thing happened during the last storm. We probably should think about building a wall to hold back the water once everything dries out.

People are getting restless. Everyone is getting bored with games. Our guest booed Lisa and her band the last time they set up to play. The trouble with boredom is that people start looking for other things to do to keep themselves entertained. This usually results in trouble, especially among the younger children. I am trying my best to remain calm but after a while, you start to wish the guest staying in your home would leave and never come back.

There really isn’t a lot to tell, no invasions, no mysteries to solve, and no horrible crimes to report.  There is just a bunch of people laying around, twiddling their thumbs. Tony and Runt are in the basement building something. I think it’s some electronic gadget.

Sheriff Pete and his deputies are keeping the peace. I actually think they are the only people currently doing anything productive. Joshua and his gang are keeping quiet in the band room. I haven’t seen much of any of them. Lost is in heaven. She loves children. The younger children are keeping her entertained and she is keeping them entertained. The Library Trio has retreated to the media center. I think they have had enough interaction with our visitors. Jonas, where is Jonas? I have my suspicions. He is probably or rather most certainly in the company of a girl. Emily is currently watching Aleece while I write in this journal.

Journal 67

It’s still raining, storming. It has not been a good morning. I went to wash up and as I was walking down the hall, I heard wind and rain. At first, I thought a window had broken in one of the classrooms in the night. I wasn’t watching the floor; I stepped into a puddle and fell onto my butt. After regaining my dignity and looking around to see if anyone had seen me fall, I stood up and opened the door to the classroom. The windows weren’t broken. Someone had opened all the windows to let in the rain. Rain was pouring into the room and debris from the wind was everywhere. The room was a disaster. I closed the windows and stomped out to the pavilion where half of the guests staying in Bear Country were sleeping. I hadn’t slept well during the night. I was pissed. I was cold and wet from the rain. My tailbone was sore. I yelled at the top of my lungs. Who opened the windows? People probably thought I was insane. A bunch of sleepy eyes stared up at me. No one said anything but as I scanned the crowd, a couple of gang members from the geckos (green lizards or whatever) were laughing. I wasn’t amused. I told them to get out. They begged me not to throw them into the storm, so I had Sheriff Pete lock them in one of the utility closets. I’ll let them out later.

I knew it would happen. People are hungry and those who don’t have food are stealing from those who do. Pete and his deputies have been breaking up fights all morning. I don’t know how long this storm is going to last. We have all been hungry. It’s not a feeling I like. To help keep the peace and to keep the little ones from starving I have asked volunteers to cook up some potatoes. We have a surplus of potatoes. We also have dried pinto beans, but these take all day to cook. I hate pinto beans, but I think none of our guests is going to complain. It’s all Bear Country can spare.

Journal 66

Most of Bear Country is asleep except for the few people left playing spades. Tony stopped by to see how Aleece and I were doing. It was so sweet. He reminded me to stay away from the windows and to keep a blanket spread out over the top of Aleece’s cradle in case a window breaks and junk flies through the air. I’m wishing I could sleep. The storm continues to build in intensity. I hate it when there is a lightning strike, and the thunder feels as if it is directly overhead. Every time it thunders, my eyes open wide. I actually like the rain, but I hate storms. I keep telling myself to ignore it but it’s not helping. The storm doesn’t bother Aleece. She has been sleeping soundly for a couple of hours. It must be nice to be a baby with no worries.

Earlier in the evening, it started to hail outside. Some of the younger kids went out to grab some hailstones and just about the time, they got out to the center of the yard it started to hail bigger stones. They came back in with some nice size lumps on their heads. No one was injured too badly even those hailstones were the size of large marbles. I don’t know why they went out to the center of the yard when I am sure there were hailstones closer to the building. I hope this was a lesson learned.

Tony and Jonas have been placing oil lamps around the school so that people can see where they are going in night. It would be a tragedy if something bad happened and people didn’t know how to get out of the building. Then again, if you can’t see where you are going in the dark, you can’t get into trouble.

Things are going well considering the number of people that are currently inside this school. It has not been a bad evening. There were a couple of disputes between gangs, but those problems were easily settled once Sheriff Pete and his deputies told the people involved that they would have to leave if they didn’t make peace.

Journal 65

Sheriff Pete said that if he has to break up another dispute between rival gangs, he and his deputies are going to start throwing people out into the storm. Marty, Gretchen, and Cecelia set out games in the pavilion to help keep people occupied and their minds off the storm. I believe they have tournaments going in Checkers, Spades, Boggle and Yahtze. So far, everyone is playing nicely. The Library Trio thought of putting up the dartboard but reconsidered. People throw darts at others when angry. We made that mistake during the last storm.

Lisa and a few other musicians have put together a sing along near the cafeteria. I just heard a lovely rendition of “Koom by Yah” (I have no idea how to spell that). For a few moments, I could picture about thirty flower children swaying back and forth.

All the muscle boys are in the gym. Sheriff Pete had to put a couple of deputies down there to keep things under control. These people are always having arguments. It’s somewhat funny but if an argument does break out, Pete’s deputies aren’t going to be able to help much. I have seen all of Pete’s deputies and none of them has much muscle. We threatened to throw people out into the storm that don’t keep their tempers in check.

The storm continues to rage outside. It doesn’t look like it is letting up any. Emily has been watching Aleece for me so that I can keep an eye on things inside Bear Country. I think she likes playing mom and Aleece seems to like her. I told Emily that Aleece wasn’t mine and that I was taking care of her while her mom Casey was gone.  She didn’t seem to mind that I lied before.

Journal 64

Wind and rain. It’s been like this all day. The wind has begun to toss things around. Occasionally I see things blow by my window. Sheriff Pete said people have begun to arrive in Bear Country. He and his deputies are putting people in the spare classrooms. No one likes storms. I don’t like storms. They have always frightened me.

Matt and Hemy left for Central a little while ago. It’s a long walk when the weather is bad. They are going to sit through the storm there. I tried to convince them to stay here but Hemy feels as if she needs to be with her gang in a time like this. It actually makes sense because she is their leader. However, the weather is so awful they are going to be soaked to the bone by the time they get there.

Joshua brought most of his gang members here. They are taking up residence in the band room.

Tony said the news from the west is bad. He has been talking to people in Sandersville and a couple of other places over the ham radio. The storm coming our way is deadly. I moved Aleece and I into one of the inner classrooms where there aren’t any windows. With any luck, the storm moving our way will die down and only last a little longer.

Jonas and Lisa are on kitchen detail. I don’t want the other gangs raiding our food stores. I don’t mind sharing, but I would prefer that those gangs that are temporarily staying in Bear Country eat their own food before they decide to eat ours.

Journal 63

It’s a cloudy day and the temperature has significantly dropped since yesterday. I hate cloudy days. Joshua just left. He dropped by to apologize and to let me know there haven’t been any more raids on his cattle. He is worried about the weather. The cattle will be moved to a safer location. He was in a rush.

Emily dropped by my room to see Aleece. I think she wants to be my friend. I would like to be hers, although I have already started our relationship with a lie. I have been trying to figure out the best way to tell her that Aleece isn’t mine without sounding childish. The day at the park, I was pretending Aleece was mine because I honestly didn’t think I would ever see Emily again. I thought our meeting was just something that happened. Remember how I said that “Lost” barked at Father. She doesn’t bark at Emily. I think “Lost” likes her.

The wind is picking up. It looks so gloomy outside. I hate bad weather. This building serves as a storm shelter. People around Bear Country know to come here if things get very bad. I hope that opening our doors to the local gangs isn’t necessary because the last time we had a bad storm lasted for several days. People get cranky when they become confined, and food always becomes an issue because no one remembers to bring any. The residents of Bear Country begin to get cranky and irritable when the guests don’t follow the rules.